help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
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The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
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