Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
Randomize