is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
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