At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
