He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
Randomize
