I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
Randomize
