Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
