I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Randomize
