After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
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Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
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sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
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