ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
try to milk me bitch
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize
