Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
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