Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
Randomize
