we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
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