You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
