I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
of course. lets lasso hookers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
Randomize