just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
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