rhymes with "ouble enetration"
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
I think that's the first time i've seen 'you look like an ugly version of my ex' work as a pickup line
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
I think I just sharted jello shots
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