just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
I deserve this hangover.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
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