No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
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