It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Randomize
