Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
birth control should be required to get into college
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
Randomize
