physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
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Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
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Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
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