We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
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