Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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