we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Randomize
