the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
her facebook's as public as her vagina
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
There's even glitter on my cock...
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