yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
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