and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
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