Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
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I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
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And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
foreskin is a definite game changer
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal