So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
Last night I had a dream we played Uno and had sex. You won at Uno, but you lost at sex.
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.