she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
Randomize
