that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
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