Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
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