dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
The girls stopped by my apartment. They caught me naked with a nearly empty bottle of vodka in one hand, drawing crop circles in the carpet with the vacuum.
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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