she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
COCAINE IS GR8
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
Randomize
