at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize
