I think I won the penis lottery.
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
