So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
Randomize