They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
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My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
Brb crying the tears of my youth
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
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Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
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