ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
