you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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