Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Randomize