Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Randomize
