Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
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