Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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