ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
As soon as the clock wound down to zero, she declared "HALF-TIME HEAD" and pulled down my pants. After the swallow, she said "BEER CHASER," got me a new one, and asked if she could make me a sandwich. Pretty sure she's lobbying hard for a ring.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
Randomize
