Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Randomize
