Umm I'm too high to move.
So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
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