escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
