Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
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