We need to start having sex underwater more often.
either way he was missing a nipple.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Randomize
