so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize
