Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
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